Life Lesson #9 - KARMA. It just may exist.

This coming Wednesday, exactly 33 weeks will have passed since I learned that my marriage failed. My marriage ended in quite a horrific way, in a fashion that no relationship should end. The experience I have gone through is difficult to describe. Nonetheless, it was incredibly humbling and life altering. I had many dark days but I feel that I have overcome the hardship and am a better person because of it. If my book ever gets published, you can read all the dark, gory details about how it all went down (it IS, in fact, a juicy story).

According to the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale, divorce is the second most stressful life event that the average adult can experience (second only to the death of a spouse). In other words, these two psychiatrists suggest that my divorce might just be the most stressful thing that I will experience in my life. Interesting. I guess that means that if I got through this, there is little else that I can't handle. Good news.

On Wednesday morning, I will appear before a Broward county judge (without my husband) to swear that my marriage is irreparable. The judge will then ask me four more questions in order to deem us legally divorced. I hope the judge smacks a gavel down, that would be cool.

Tonight, I saw my husband (I hate calling him that) for the last time. The only reason we met was because we had to exchange some legal documents. I haven't seen him in a really long time and tonight was the last. It was weird to see him. I hope I'm not bumming anyone out but I am blogging about this because, (1) it's therapeutic for me and (2) I think it's sort of interesting. Here's what went down:

We met in the parking lot and exchanged what we needed to exchange.

Ex: Hey. How have you been?
Me: I've been good. How about you?
Ex: Not so great. (long pause) How's your new job?
Me: Really great actually. I like it and I got promoted last month.
Ex: Oh, that's nice. I'm happy for you.
(His business went under a few months after we broke up)
Ex: I can't find a job. I am going to move to Philadelphia and stay with a friend for a while.
Me: That sucks. I'm sorry.
(long pause)
Me: Hey, what did you do with your flight voucher from our cancelled honeymoon?
Ex: I used it to go home to England. What are you going to do with yours?
Me: Oh, I decided to still go to Maui.
(His eyebrows raise in question)
Me: Yeah, I decided that I really don't want to miss out on Maui, so I am just gonna go by myself.
Ex: You are going by yourself?
Me: Yep.
(awkward pause)
Me: Well, I guess that's it. Good luck to you.
Ex: Yeah, take care. Sorry about everything.
(awkward hug)

Then POOF! Just like that he is gone. I was married for a year and separated for the past 7 1/2 months. I find it so interesting that the person I once swore to honor "until death do us part", I will actually never see again. He will move somewhere and my life will continue to go on. And quite frankly, my life is better now than it has ever been.

So does Karma exist? I suppose no one really knows for sure. However, I think it just might because since all this shit happened, my life has been tremendously blessed. His life has been filled with adversity and constant stress.

This is a weird week for me. One huge chapter of my life officially and legally ends on Wednesday. On Saturday, I turn 31 years-0ld. I have re-vamped my life and plan to never look back. Perhaps surprisingly, I am excited to become another year older. I am looking forward to ending my 30th year and beginning my 31st. I hope good things will continue to come my way. Just in case Karma does exist, I am gonna be super duper nice to all of y'all!